Thoughts on Feminism

From basic rights to rape culture to LGBTQIA issues to patriarchy, we discuss it all.

A man came to our class once,
he claimed to be a fair judge
with daughters he loved.

He asked a question to the class:
“When should a minor be tried
as an adult?”
and students began raising their hand

“murder”
he wrote it up on the board.

“robbery”
he wrote it up on the board.

I said, “Rape”
and he paused, he asked
for clarification

“You mean violent rape?”

“no I mean rape.
It is all the same.”

he looked to a boy
who said “rape only if
he used a weapon and
hurt her.”

and I said, “rape is rape,
whether his weapon is a knife,
drugs, or guilt. She said no.”

he shook his head,
and wrote
“Violent rape” on the board
anyways.

I never understood,
because you can kill somebody
quietly and peacefully with drugs,
or with guns and knives or cars;
but nobody cares if the murder was “violent”

it was still murder.

—#yesallwomen by Amanda Katherine Ricketson (via cyberunfamous)

(Source: -poetic, via ambertree97)

mediamattersforamerica:

"Let men be men": Fox hosts eagerly agreed with the NY Post article that claimed “catcalls are flattering.” 

A few more gems from this segment

  • "They mean it in a nice way."
  • "It’s nice to get compliments."
  • "As long as you don’t come within arms length, it’s fine."

But for many women, catcalls are humiliating and degrading. Some blame themselves, wondering what they could have done differently to prevent it. And the consequences can considerably affect a person’s social behavior and habits, as women report they avoid eye contact and walking alone in public, or change their outfits or routes to avoid harassment.”  

In reality, this is no small problem. According to Stop Street Harassment, “at least 65% of women have experienced catcalls, leers, and unwanted sexual propositions,” disproportionately affecting those with low incomes, women of color, and the LGBTQ community. And while there are federal laws protecting women from workplace harassment, street harassment is addressed on a state-by-state basis.

Let’s bring some voices of reason into this discussion:

Natalie DiBlasio, USA TODAY:

Catcalling does not mean you are beautiful, smart, strong or interesting. Catcalling means a stranger values you so little he doesn’t care if he makes you feel uncomfortable or threatened.

Margaret Eby, Brooklyn Magazine:

Catcalling is about control, not about your cute shorts. It’s an assertion that women are just visitors in a male space, there to be assessed by appearance and summarily dismissed or flirted with.

Ashley Ross, TIME:

To legitimize catcalling is to give voice to those who don’t deserve it: the man who told me he wanted to perform oral sex on me, the man who said he wanted it the other way around and the man who said he could have me if he wanted me.

The dehumanizing culture of catcalling must stop, but conservative media outlets like Fox aren’t helping. It’s up to us all to educate ourselves about the harms of harassment, so that women can truly be free in the streets of America.

(via wilwheaton)

  • Early Feminists: Oh hey, we see that you can vote. We would like to vote also. I mean, since most of those laws effect us too and all.
  • Men: YOU JUST WANT SUPERIORITY OVER MEN!
  • Mid-century Feminists: Hey, that whole thing about how you can have careers and earn a living wage outside the home? Yes that sounds nice, we'd like the option to do that as well.
  • Men: YOU WANT A MATRIARCHY, THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT!
  • Late 20th century Feminists: Hey we would like to make our own choices about our reproductive health, just like you've always had.
  • Men: YOU ARE TRYING TO TAKE MEN'S RIGHTS AWAY!
  • Modern-day feminists: Hey, if you could you stop sexually assaulting/harassing us and them blaming us for it, that'd be pretty great.
  • Men: THIS IS MISANDRY, MISANDRY I SAY! FEMINISTS HAVE GONE TOO FAR!
  • Feminists: Um...
  • Men: THE END OF MEN IS NIGH! MALE OPPRESSION IS REAL! THE MATRIARCHAL AGE IS UPON US!

Undercover Colors and The Pushback

Undercover colors is a group that is coming out with a nail polish that would be able to detect date rape drugs in a drink in a matter of seconds after a woman or man stirs it with their finger. I add man because I think in all of this it has been neglected that (A) Men get date raped too, (B) Men can wear nail polish.  Anyway, it is another weapon in the anti-rape arsenal.

Our lovely Anna, posted about it and I looked it up because I hadn’t heard much about it before the post. It seems like an amazing idea and I know I’m all for it but it surprised me to see the number of advocacy groups against it so I went on to read their points as well. I was brought face to face with what has always bothered me about victim advocacy groups (aside from that title, we are survivors).

This quote, borrowed from The Salt Lake City Tribune kind of hit a raw nerve with me.

"Whilst Undercover Color’s initiative is well meaning, on the whole," she said, "Rape Crisis does not endorse or promote such a product or anything similar. This is for three reasons: It implies that it’s the woman’s fault and assumes responsibility on her behalf, and detracts from the real issues that arise from sexual violence.

"For us, we work with victims to make them realize that they did nothing wrong," she added. "Among primary cases, some do ask if they could have done anything to stop it. Products like this suggest otherwise. The emphasis must be placed 100 percent on the perpetrator."

While I agree wholeheartedly that the person who was raped is never to blame for the act, I think it’s irresponsible on the part of these advocacy groups to turn their noses up at things that can be preventative. I do think there is a problem with victim blaming, I have seen it firsthand, but I think that is something we must stand together to change.

I think that things like this, need to be widespread. I think all bars should have the coasters that work to the same effect. To me, it’s much like taking Airborne before a flight or being the person who carries around band-aids. It is another way to be prepared for the world that we now live in. If people carry around rape whistles and pepper spray, why can’t this be looked at it in the same way?

~Victoria~

"But women get unfair advantages in custody battles"

handaxe:

FALSE. Fathers who ask for sole custody are far more likely to get it. It’s just that they don’t ask, mostly women do. Men win custody over women even if they are ostensibly unfit. More and more, judges and parents rule in favor of 50/50 custody. In fact, in the past ten years, the men’s rights movement has been devastating to women seeking custody in court and women are awarded sole custody about half as many times as men.  

So find a new fucking myth. 

(via southern-feminism)

nowyoukno:

Source for more facts follow NowYouKno

Four college MEN did this. I love seeing men taking initiative to try to help keep women safe from rapists. Honorable men like this is what keeps my faith in humanity intact.
~Anna

nowyoukno:

Source for more facts follow NowYouKno

Four college MEN did this. I love seeing men taking initiative to try to help keep women safe from rapists. Honorable men like this is what keeps my faith in humanity intact.

~Anna

(via thranduil-the-elven-king)